Motivation and self-control have nothing to do with why you can’t seem to stick to your self-growth plans. Stop beating yourself up now, and instead learn the ONE thing your plan is missing that will actually support and encourage massive transformation.
Before we begin, let’s all take a nice, deep, cleansing breath together…inhaling more of what we want, more of what we need, more of what we love, and a nice slow exhaling out all the doubt, all the fear, and all that nasty self-criticism. Great! Feels good, doesn’t it?
You know what doesn’t feel good? Creating a long list of expectations for yourself, and then beating yourself up for not being able to change all at once. I used to do that to myself all the time! Because we often know what we need to do, right?
Millions of people every day set goals to eat healthy, get into better shape, get that promotion, stop procrastinating, spend more time with family, start a new business, buy a new home…the list goes on and on. So we pump ourselves up and we create these rigid plans for ourselves to try and move our actions in the right direction, and in theory— these plans SHOULD work. And we want SO BADLY to make positive changes in our lives and get new and exciting results, so why do we find it so hard to stick to these plans? What’s missing?
We begin to ask ourselves things like,
“What’s wrong with me?”
We begin to think terrible things about ourselves like,
● “Why am I so self-destructive?”
● “Why am I not more motivated?”
● “Why can’t I have more self-control?”
● “Why am I so lazy?”
● “Why can’t I be more like her?”
● “Why can’t I be more like him?”
● “Why does it seem so easy for them?”
Do some of these sound familiar? UGH! And all those thoughts just leave us feeling so down on ourselves, and so far away from where we want to be.
Listen, you’re not alone in feeling this way. And you know what? There is NOTHING wrong with your motivation levels, or your self-control. And you’ll never force yourself to make big changes in your life by berating and belittling yourself for doing things imperfectly. We are spiritual beings having a human experience! It’s an imperfect process by design. We aren’t put here just to grind and hustle, and churn out material results day-in and day-out. We are here to explore our creativity, express our love for others, and experience the world around us.
When we find ourselves resisting our best intentions and our big plans for creating self-growth, it’s because we are lacking in one very important area: Self-care.
That’s right! When we falter and fumble on our path to living our best life, we don’t need a good brow-beating. Because when we make ourselves feel bad, it leads to treating ourselves like we don’t deserve to have the bigger, better, greater things we dream about. What we need is more love, more grace, more kindness, and more understanding. We need to get in our own corner and have compassion for where we are today so that taking care of ourselves comes more naturally. We need to set ourselves up to win, and I have three really special techniques to share with you to help you do just that.
Let me ask you something: The changes you want to make in your life, do you want to make them because you believe there is something wrong with who you are today? Or— Do you want to make these changes in your life because you deserve to be happy?
Do you want to do more with your life because you think you aren’t doing enough now? Or— Is it because you know you have SO MUCH MORE to offer?
Can you see how one perspective can break you down, and another can build you up? Without self-care, there is no self-growth.
Be sure to watch the episode above to learn 3 really simple and loving ways you can fortify your efforts to stick to your self-growth plan, and reaffirm to yourself that no matter what, you are valuable, loveable, and worthy of happiness. Namaste.